On Being A Strong Willed Woman

Earlier today, a friend pointed out to me that I am “Strong Willed”.

The first thing that came to mind was the stereotyped view of Strong Willed Women being ‘bossy, bitchy and maybe even angry people

strong willed women

source- quotesgram.com

So there i was trying to argue my way out of being that because I’m not even bossy(maybe a little bit?) but definitely not bitchy or angry(I laugh too much for that). But you know what? Two seconds later (definitely longer than two seconds) I was actively embracing it because YES, I AM A STRONG WILLED WOMAN.  It wasn’t the first time I was told this. Actually too many people have mentioned this to me so oh well….

Source- pinterest

Source- pinterest

Source- pinterest

Source- pinterest

What exactly does being a Strong Willed Woman entail?

I say woman because I don’t think being a strong willed man is seen as a thing in comparison to being the female version.

Characteristics of a Strong Willed Woman

  1. An efficient communicator. No time to sugarcoat things, she speaks her mind and likes to be straight with things. Beating around the bush only leads to confusion so when something bothers her, she lets you know. You need an honest opinion? Ask her, shes very opinionated. 

    quotes for strong willed woman

    source- pinterest

  2. She sees no need to get everyone in line with their views. She doesn’t care what people think about her but rather focuses on improving herself. 

    source- pinterest

    source- pinterest

  3. Knows what she wants and so wouldn’t settle. Settling is her worst nightmare. Don’t bother about her getting jealous because she is secure enough in herself to know what and who is worth her time.
  4. Purposeful living. Her life is full of goals and visions for the future. She is very ambitious and works hard to get herself to the top. She enjoys some hobbies & interests and is passionate about things she loves. 

    boss lady

    source- pinterest

  5. Always loyal. In friendships and relationships, she expects honesty and commitment because she is willing to return it. She chooses what she wants and so holds on to it when she gets it. When you break this trust, she is not slow to call you out on it/cut you off completely.
  6. Sees value in freedom and space. She likes to do things on her own and enjoys her solitude. It drives her and is essential for daily living.
  7. She loves herself. She is a firm believer of self love. She is comfortable in her skin and wears whatever she wants. She takes care of herself and plays up with her unique features. She dances whenever she pleases and laughs out loud.

    source- pinterest

    source- pinterest

  8. Her own toughest critic. She sets the bar high and so expects a lot from herself. She is constantly pushing herself and when she falls, she pulls herself back up.

    source- pinterest

    source- pinterest

  9. Miss independent. She often doesn’t need your help and likes to be in control/ahead of things. She needs to be able to solve problems on her own but isn’t shy to ask for help when needed.
  10. Likes to questions things. Nothing is normal to her and traditional notions are not as interesting. When she’s told something, she’s not afraid to question it. It keeps her on her feet.

    source- pinterest

    source- pinterest

So what is the fuss about being strong willed then?

I guess it all sounds amazing for stuff like running a company but not so much for an intimate relationship. Why? Because the man would then be held accountable for his words and would have to justify his ideas, beliefs, etc.

Sigh, I mean she would have an independent life form with a mind of her own like I feel every person should.

Often times all these excuses men about why they wouldn’t date a strong willed woman just feels like they want women as obedient puppies- no questions asked just pleasing the master. It’s sad some men still think this way especially since today’s women are more vocal and confident about who they are and what values they believe in.

But hey, it’s not how it seems. They are so many pros to dealing having a relationship with our type, here are a few.

  1. You’re in for interesting conversations.
  2. You can ask for advice and not feel less of a man.
  3. You’d have someone to help you when life’s challenges come.
  4. You won’t have to do all the talking at social gatherings ha-ha.
  5. Her strength would make you feel stronger and secure.
  6. You have all the realness one can give.

It may all seem like work but we all agree that nothing good comes easy and without a challenge.

 

So cheers to all the strong willed women out there. May we know them, May we be them and May we raise them.

You are terrifying and strange and beautiful, something not everyone knows how to love.

22 Comments

  • TANG September 21, 2016 at 3:23 pm

    Yesssiirrr I am definitely a strong-willed woman. I particularly like the picture in number 10 and then who likes boring women? Blehh! Love the post darling, I’m so sharing it.
    wumituase.wordpress.com

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 21, 2016 at 3:51 pm

      Ayeee osshey!!! Strong willed woman squadd or whut?! nobody likes a boring woman after all

      Reply
    • KacheeTee September 22, 2016 at 9:02 am

      Lol @ well behaved women rarely make history. Seen that before and I guess it depends on the context. But there’s nothing wrong in being strong willed. And I particularly love that quote of being, knowing and raising strong women.

      http://www.KacheeTee.com

      Reply
      • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:15 am

        Yes i also think it depends on the context. Thanks for the love!

        Reply
  • Deborah September 22, 2016 at 3:02 am

    Awesome stuff!! Yay to being strong-willed!

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:13 am

      Thanks for stopping by!!

      Reply
  • Sharron September 22, 2016 at 9:18 am

    Being strong willed as a woman can be intimidating to some people but there is no other way of living life. I think i am everyday i am finding my way to live as a strong willed young woman.

    http://deffinatlyshaz.co.zw/

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:17 am

      Exactly! No other way.. Cheers to being strong willed, hope to see you more here

      Reply
  • Gracey September 22, 2016 at 9:40 am

    Now this post I like. Nothing wrong with being strong willed.

    Epiphany29.com
    STOP PICKING, START HEALING

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:17 am

      Thank you Gracey!!!

      Reply
  • Olaitan September 22, 2016 at 10:54 pm

    I’m definitely strong willed. Quite stubborn with it too. No 10 is so me. I question virtually everything. Lol. Love the pictures in the post!
    Laitanbee Blog

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:18 am

      Hahaha… I question everything too. Why you gotta love all the pictures in the post? Lmao 🙂

      Reply
  • Praise Abu September 23, 2016 at 5:48 am

    I’m a strong willed woman. Love the post dear, so insightful and very inspiring as well. I love all the quotes, quote 7 gets me.
    My Style Look Book Series

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:18 am

      I’m glad you enjoyed the post!!

      Reply
  • Funke Olotu September 23, 2016 at 10:10 am

    Yass. This post is for me!!

    Cheers to my strong willed sisters!

    You see that number 3 is so accurate, I get what I want and will never settle until I do, and the well behaved women rarely make history quote reminds me of my post on women choosing btw their career & marriage.

    I love this post and hoping to read more like this !

    https://funkeolotu.com

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde September 27, 2016 at 2:19 am

      Thank you so much for your feedback Funke! Never ever settle!

      Reply
  • Nnenna Ndiya October 2, 2016 at 2:29 am

    Yes to this post! Being in a male dominated field I quickly realized that men weren’t too fond of women that are strong-willed, but I also realized that strong-willed women contributed to things running more smoothly within companies lol

    http://www.nnenna-ndiya.com

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde October 8, 2016 at 5:44 am

      Yes they definitely do. Thanks for stopping by Nnenna 🙂

      Reply
  • Favour October 5, 2016 at 3:59 pm

    I love this post. Cos I’ve also been seen as bitchy or intimidating cos I refuse to be mistreated mostly by men. There’s nothing wrong with being strong willed and independent. It’s something to take pride in.
    Lovely writeup.

    http://www.girleccentric.wordpress.com

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde October 8, 2016 at 5:47 am

      Thank you darling!! Cheers

      Reply
  • Ope October 28, 2016 at 11:49 am

    I love this post,toluwani you are doing a very great job

    Reply
    • Toluwalade Toyin-Kehinde October 28, 2016 at 5:13 pm

      Thank you Ope.

      Reply

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